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[NeoX] Journal 3 - Housekeeping
1 June, year uncertain
Time passes with a newfound monotony of my daily life. The struggle to maintain a semblance of sanity is beginning to wear on me, since I have my self-enforced routine as the only anchor to hold onto as time passes in my new ‘home’. I have found that as time has passed that my opinion of my flatmate have begun to change and perhaps even soften somewhat from when she was first assigned to me. She has become a bit more conversational to me, and arguably she is the most patient and agreeable companion I have ever lived with.
The two primary struggles I continue to deal with daily are both entirely personal. I have not had a strong drink or a smoke since my arrival, and I have found through reading on the subject that it was determined at some point between my then and my now that tobacco has an addictive quality. This would explain the edginess that I had been feeling and my…temperamental outbursts. Talia duly informed me that she could not get me any tobacco because it was a restricted item here in ‘transitional housing’, but that she could get me something to, as she said, ‘take the edge off’. She left, and returned a bit later with a brightly colored box that contained assorted colored lozenges. I took one, and it was a pleasant cherry flavor, and to my surprise it was quite soothing. She explained it contained a set amount of nicotine and that as time passed I would be able to get more with a lower amount until I no longer needed them. I nodded, and for the time being I was happy to no longer have that feeling from before.
The second issue was of an even more personal nature. There was a point in my isolation that I missed physical human contact of any sort. I might argue that it was brought on by the previous issue, but it was weighing on me to the point of distraction. Finally, at some point before lunch, I found myself glancing at my companion more than I usually did.
“Talia, how do you feel?” I said, without taking the connotations of the statement in mind. She cocked her head slightly to the left, which was a physical trait she displayed whenever she was seeking to come up with an answer to a question of mine that was not simply a Yes or No.
“I am well. While my personality matrix has been designed to accommodate most variances of human emotion, I do not currently experience emotional changes in the same way a biologic does, if that is what you mean Ms. Dagger” She looked at me and I must say that despite her artificial eyes she did appear to be mimicking the proper expression of concern. I audibly sighed and fought the urge to press my face into my palm momentarily.
“Come over here for a moment.”
She stepped over to where I was seated, and I took her forearm in my hand, gripping it gently as my fingers wrapped around just below her elbow. To my surprise it was soft, and slightly cool to the touch. Somehow I had expected it to be hard, yet it was pliant under my hand much like a muscled limb would feel. I looked at her face again and I could almost, almost see a slight softening of her usual expression.
“Talia, your skin is cold. Is that normal for you? I mean I rather expected it to be since you are…” My voice trailed off a bit as I thought about what to say next.
“Not ‘real’? It is a normal thought for a biologic that has not been accustomed to dealing with synthetics. To answer your question, I am able to have a more human skin temperature if that is something you desire.” She looked at me again and now I could see another very slight shift in her expression, almost as if this was making her happy. “My series of production have the ability to adjust our external temperature to match the ambient temperature of our environment, or to match what is considered to be human normal.”
I nodded, and without saying or thinking much more guided her behind me. I put both her arms over my shoulders and tucked them around my neck as her breasts compressed against my back. She felt warm against me, and I closed my eyes and relaxed into her arms.
“Had you requested it, I am aware of both what a hug is and how to give one Ms. Dagger.”
I sighed audibly and let my head rock forward. “You certainly know how to take all the magic out of the moment Talia.” I leaned my head onto her arm, and said quietly “Jed. You can call me Jed.”
Time passes with a newfound monotony of my daily life. The struggle to maintain a semblance of sanity is beginning to wear on me, since I have my self-enforced routine as the only anchor to hold onto as time passes in my new ‘home’. I have found that as time has passed that my opinion of my flatmate have begun to change and perhaps even soften somewhat from when she was first assigned to me. She has become a bit more conversational to me, and arguably she is the most patient and agreeable companion I have ever lived with.
The two primary struggles I continue to deal with daily are both entirely personal. I have not had a strong drink or a smoke since my arrival, and I have found through reading on the subject that it was determined at some point between my then and my now that tobacco has an addictive quality. This would explain the edginess that I had been feeling and my…temperamental outbursts. Talia duly informed me that she could not get me any tobacco because it was a restricted item here in ‘transitional housing’, but that she could get me something to, as she said, ‘take the edge off’. She left, and returned a bit later with a brightly colored box that contained assorted colored lozenges. I took one, and it was a pleasant cherry flavor, and to my surprise it was quite soothing. She explained it contained a set amount of nicotine and that as time passed I would be able to get more with a lower amount until I no longer needed them. I nodded, and for the time being I was happy to no longer have that feeling from before.
The second issue was of an even more personal nature. There was a point in my isolation that I missed physical human contact of any sort. I might argue that it was brought on by the previous issue, but it was weighing on me to the point of distraction. Finally, at some point before lunch, I found myself glancing at my companion more than I usually did.
“Talia, how do you feel?” I said, without taking the connotations of the statement in mind. She cocked her head slightly to the left, which was a physical trait she displayed whenever she was seeking to come up with an answer to a question of mine that was not simply a Yes or No.
“I am well. While my personality matrix has been designed to accommodate most variances of human emotion, I do not currently experience emotional changes in the same way a biologic does, if that is what you mean Ms. Dagger” She looked at me and I must say that despite her artificial eyes she did appear to be mimicking the proper expression of concern. I audibly sighed and fought the urge to press my face into my palm momentarily.
“Come over here for a moment.”
She stepped over to where I was seated, and I took her forearm in my hand, gripping it gently as my fingers wrapped around just below her elbow. To my surprise it was soft, and slightly cool to the touch. Somehow I had expected it to be hard, yet it was pliant under my hand much like a muscled limb would feel. I looked at her face again and I could almost, almost see a slight softening of her usual expression.
“Talia, your skin is cold. Is that normal for you? I mean I rather expected it to be since you are…” My voice trailed off a bit as I thought about what to say next.
“Not ‘real’? It is a normal thought for a biologic that has not been accustomed to dealing with synthetics. To answer your question, I am able to have a more human skin temperature if that is something you desire.” She looked at me again and now I could see another very slight shift in her expression, almost as if this was making her happy. “My series of production have the ability to adjust our external temperature to match the ambient temperature of our environment, or to match what is considered to be human normal.”
I nodded, and without saying or thinking much more guided her behind me. I put both her arms over my shoulders and tucked them around my neck as her breasts compressed against my back. She felt warm against me, and I closed my eyes and relaxed into her arms.
“Had you requested it, I am aware of both what a hug is and how to give one Ms. Dagger.”
I sighed audibly and let my head rock forward. “You certainly know how to take all the magic out of the moment Talia.” I leaned my head onto her arm, and said quietly “Jed. You can call me Jed.”